Stardusty

I finished the novel Stardust by Neil Gaiman today and contrary to the movie which I adore whole-heartedly, the story ended with me feeling melancholic.

I loved the movie so much I wanted to read the real stuff, the original version of the story but now I think I'd happily settle for the movie version.

As much as I find the world of Faerie intriguing, fascinating and magical, I could not find the warmth and longing to be in that world I had felt when I was engrossed in the movie. It lacked the very essence which made me fall in love with the movie in the first place. You know, I came out of the velvety cinema with this perfectly woozy feeling.

I didn't understand how the star, Yvaine could fall in love with Tristran because Neil made it so sudden. Like we were not allowed into these two characters' mind and secret thoughts as readers to understand the characters. I'd have loved to have seen it coming with more clarity. I felt as though Yvaine in the novel was almost obliged to fall for Tristran.

Instead of all the wonderful cosiness, I come out of reading with this sadness because the story ended with a sad note. Dah lah the romance lost its kick, Neil had to end it with the sense of loneliness.

The last paragraph that nailed glumness upon me being:
"They say that each night, when the duties of state permit, she climbs, on foot, and limps, alone, to the highest peak of the palace, where she stands for hour after hour, seeming not to notice the cold peak winds. She says nothing at all, but simply stares upward into the dark sky and watches, with sad eyes, the slow dance of the infinite stars."

Call it empathy but I felt so sad that Yvaine could never go back to where she came from. Plus, she's immortal, Tristran wasn't, he expired. And no one know what she is now. She's likely the only left who knows herself because those who knew had taken the secret with them to their graves. Her family's out of reach, her lover's beneath the earth.

How lonely.

I need to listen to some perky music now. Ciao.

Some two years back

Nostalgia...

I was trying to read my notes for Monday's test and suddenly I thought of my Form 5 physics teacher, Mr Ung Shih Him. Gee, high school is two years ago. Can you believe it??? Back then when we were trying to screw up time to get past the whole five years and now it feels like ancient history.

Then I remembered Lin, my class partner in everything, who shared so much of high school with me [including describing Mr Ung as a China Doll look-alike, it wasn't meant to insult, he did look somehow adorable with his jet black hair]. It seemed like the two years we spent in the same class would be forever...but before you know it, Lin's finished SAM and is now pursuing Psychology in Australia. I guess that that 'forever' is not enough. I miss her and all my other bosom pals deeply.

My mind flickered back to the present and I pictured my current classmates, comparing them to Lin, KayT and JM. They were two sets of friends. Neither sharing anything the other went through with me. Somehow, at this very moment, I feel myself cherishing the past more than the present. Not because the present sucks...the present is wonderfully decorated with people I have grown to love...but because I realise that all that I'm missing now, I may never come to experience again. Such is my habit of holding on to the things I love so deeply.

Life moves on and changes take place in every aspect of each and everyone's lives. We could never get back those days when we were gossiping about Jason the monkey or laughing out loud or even ponteng-ing classes or the long recesses or Sukhihotu or heart-to hearts or ...the list goes on. All in those formerly boring torquise pinafore, in the compounds of a place we knew so well, in our growth-restricted hairdos.

The nostalgia envelopes me with a tinge of pain mixed with delight. I'm hurt because the twists and turns in life have had me feeling like I'm losing them. I'm glad because it happened. We helped each other grow up and blossom into who we are now.

To Ee Lin, KayT, JM:

Thank you. I'm blessed to have known you all. Wherever our dreams take us from now on, do keep our bond intact. There is no other replica of our friendship, it is unique in itself. I graduated with more than just a certificate and knowledge from books, I graded with friendship. Solid friendship. Some people find it at other stages in life, some are still searching but I found it in you three. Love you guys always! Even if we're all masing-masing too busy with our lives to contact one another that often.